Words Like Albatross

Haven't written much here in a while. Some pics and maybe a blurb or two. But I've been forced to think about language and communication a lot lately. Words have weight. Real mass. How one says something to someone varies a lot just in the context of the conversation. Or the respective pecking order. I've found that I have to think too much about how I'm going to say something to someone because my words now have more weight in certain situations. I am ambivalent about this. I thought I wanted more input. I would like to see certain things accomplished. How I motivate someone to accomplish goals that we should share. Accomplishments to take pride in. But I live in a world where change is not only resented but actively fought. We can't do it that way because that's not how that works. We've never done it that way. What do you mean I have to learn a new system for the fourth time in four years. Why do you want to force us to grow and learn and strive. I like things the way they used to be. Until at the end of the day I feel physically tired from wading through verbiage to find the right words to get the task accomplished. Or understanding where the person talking has been coming from. I'm not sure anymore that I have the stamina anymore. It's all cover your ass and point the finger. I'd rather see it be about "We did that." God was I naive.